They say not to spend much time thinking of the past,
But what if my past was wasted on those undeserving,
What if I gave the best of me to someone who couldn’t love the worst of me?
But what if the well of my love has been bled dry for missed trust and broken promises?
What if I gave them the best years of my life?
What if all that is left for me is a void of loneliness and an inability to trust?
What if my opportunity for real expansive love was squandered on my youth?
A time when I rejected deep connections and unrelenting love,
What if my best days are the ones I can no longer revisit?
The ones filled with reckless abandon, not walls of self-doubt,
What if the damage has already been done?
And I am slowly cocooning into myself,
What if I squandered the opportunities for real connection?
Filled my heart with negativity and fear,
And now I’m left with the fruits it bore…
Nov 2021- R1