One of my goals in 2022, is to continue with a personal journal consistently. This time around, I chose to go the route of using prompts; the self searching kind. One of the questions which recently came up, was What 3 things do you need to forgive yourself for? You can imagine that not only was it a tough question to answer, it was very much an emotive one as well. It got me thinking and it birthed this blog post. This week, we share the things we need to forgive ourselves about.
Don’t be defined by your past. It was a lesson, not a life sentence.Karen Salmansohn
Sometimes when I’m not having my best mental health days, I tend to overthink ( we have blogged about this previously ). And although I am fully aware of how unhealthy it is for me, I can’t help but spiral. Within this spiral, I find myself reflecting and thinking about my past. Replaying things I know full well I can’t change. One of the things that stuck out to me was the fact that I felt in some way I was responsible for tearing my daughter’s world, as she knew it, apart. I will never forget the look on her face when I told her that her parents would no longer be together. If the definition of distraught could be defined, it was the look on her face that day. It broke my heart to see her in pain and to know that ultimately I had made that decision. I know that I have to pursue my own happiness, because if I don’t then I am only hurting myself and in some ways hindering my progress. And even though I can look back and know 100% that I have 0 regrets about. Oddly, where a part of me feels sad about ending things, but knowing what I know now- another part of me wishes I had done it sooner. I could have felt the happiness I currently feel much sooner, but sometimes timing is everything.
Make peace with your broken pieces.r.h. sin
One thing I know I have to work on is letting go of the past, it’s a weight I don’t need to carry but it’s also something I don’t regret doing. Feeling like I am responsible for “ruining” someone’s life is something I shouldn’t feel but this was one of the last words I was told and in some way it tends to creep up on me on the days when I’m feeling low. What I know to be true is the fact that in order for me to live the life I wanted, I needed to take the leap to do something for myself. If there is any advice I can give, it’s the fact that I would say…let it go. It always seems simplistic when said but it’s vital for your mental progress and well-being. Forgiveness is important. There are multiple articles, studies and more, about the importance of forgiveness but it’s not often that we read about forgiving ourselves. It can be vital for your own self-healing, because holding on will not change the past, and it will NOT improve your future. So, let it go, release the weight of decisions you could have made differently and focus on the things you CAN change. An optimistic outlook will only add value to your life as opposed to reliving a time period you can do nothing about.